think.act.do

DYING in lecture.

2008-09-14T21:49:00.000-07:00

what am i doing here..? OM OM OM sucks

NEW CHAPTER!

2008-09-07T10:27:00.000-07:00

HI diary, OMG its been how many light space years ive been here. Im in uni now, forced to grow and learn. its like stepping up another flight of stairs, exhilarating but worrying! man pray pray pray

HOLY COW

2008-07-06T10:03:00.000-07:00

OMG i finally said it. bless me, and make it work. hell yeah.

BIZAD BIZAD

2008-06-27T03:14:00.000-07:00

man bizad camp was such a blast! haha the best camp i've ever been to man. except for maybe FRIGHT NIGHT which happily lives up to its name. i was fucking freaked out, well done guys. and im so sorry marcus for ripping your shirt, please keep it hush hush okay? hahahaha i swear it was the ghost's fault. hahahah I love archie so much, if it was like thunderbirds or something, maybe i would have like DIED hoho!
way to go guys cant wait to go RAG and OWEEK!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

wtf

2008-06-19T09:03:00.000-07:00

just how long does this need to take? one after another. even the strongest of all human will will bend to this. its like im only 19. i know its already 19 more like it, but there's a limit to the ability of a 19 year old. hell, why wont everything just settle down and stop its nonsense? it wont wans. why not? what makes you think this isnt to test you? then what, test for like 10 over years? thats bull. thats not bull its happening.

you know what you call a heart that has given up and succumbed to fate? its called despondence.

a new start

2008-06-17T08:33:00.000-07:00

man, after so long we met we talked. its like everything starts all over again. but it wont be the same as it is before im sure. and i accept it. i pray that we have a good ending. friends, im contented. (: pray for me dear whoever.

haha good day.

shit team. shit work

2008-06-15T21:58:00.000-07:00

how long must this go on? i have never seen a team this screwed up. (well it sure is a learning experience) the tongue can cause wonders, and yet disasters. respect, sense, maturity, missing. idiocity super present. a bunch of nonsense. whoever i hang out with, is no shit business of theirs, and so am i given the same privilege to hang with whoever i like. fucked up is what i would say of them. fuck off is what i would say TO them. im not gonna leave just like that, but i sure will do something to make these ppl learn their lesson. call me crafty, call me conceited. its survival. have it or perish.

to hell with these idiots, will you please grow up of high school ALREADY?

empty

2008-06-14T10:14:00.000-07:00

dear whoever,

im feeling empty again. it haunts me again and again. please bless me with the wits to find out why and the hope/faith to know that it will go away sooner or later.

cross fingers

know your limits, period

2008-06-07T07:29:00.000-07:00

fuck those who dont understand the word -RESPECT. its so simple, you do your stuff i stay out of yours. and i forgot to mention that besides that these ppl are a child stuck in a 19 year old's body, period. brains havent developed, neither have their common sense and logical thinking. Hurt is hurt but once its over it becomes anger. and, better still this is the most powerful weapon. i dont care if it looks back on me. my image is worth them getting what they deserve. God has eyes, he can see. so lets all wait and we'll get to see who has the last laugh. Hate is no longer a four letter word for me. it has so much more meaning now.

wans in the season

2008-05-17T10:27:00.000-07:00

life cant always be lenient huh. so be it. this few weeks is gonna be work work work. actually its fun just that there is so much stuff going on at once and they all affect each other. gotta be really careful there.

sam if your reading this, when are we friggin going to zouk? you army boys are too busy huh. hahaha better reply me or you wont see the sun tmr okay!

those ugly bruises on me wont go away. UGH unsightly

2008-05-06T09:11:00.000-07:00

dear whoever,
im feeling so empty like i've never been. i dont know why. maybe im emotionally not recovered yet. maybe its time for that retreat that i always used to have. except that ppl dont really bother, do they? you can talk the talk, but if you cant do it, doesnt seem very convincing to me, and words just dont have any value. right?

i know somethings are put to test me, but then its kinda shit how it always goes round the roulette and comes back to me. like what did i do? do i have that face that says im so easy-going, come pit yourself against me? i was being myself, doing what i stand for. if a relationship cant take things like that, how strong can it get? dont find just someone who happened to fall into the picture and point the blame. and i dont think it reflects well, i mean how giving can a person be, if she's so petty, playing all that if-you-dont-do-it-i-wont-do-it mind game. call that a matured relationship for ppl who are older than me.

yeah, so tell me am i unhappy or what.

dear god please give me strength.

2008-04-27T09:33:00.000-07:00

OH MY GOD please bless us that this concert goes smoothly, and all will fall into place. i hope this bad feeling isnt true. PLS. ): holy maloney. its crazy juggling all this man, i wonder how we got through SYF and school and all that jazz. cant update bout anything recently, cause ive been so caught up with dance that there isnt much happening. but then yeah the only thing i remember is that we were slogging for dance pracs, like yesterday, and yesterday, and..uh yesterday yesterday???

im blank. now. so out.

http://www.blogthings.com/whatkindofcookieareyouquiz/

2008-04-21T21:24:00.000-07:00

cant be more stressed bout the concert, we always finish just in time. i dont want that to happen AGAIN, period. better be good.

anyways time to update some stuff. FRIDAY went MOS with stephen terry christopher and this other guy(cant remember his name), cause christopher ORD-ed, and had lots of fun. (no matter how sucky the music was, kinda) still had fun anywho. it was funny seeing those transies on the floor doing their thing. you have no idea the way those caucasians look, as they swarm towards them. HOHO
but some not very nice stuff happened, and i swear if i see him again at the clubs with us, i would kick his ass. some ppl just dont know how to behave at the clubs. but then again its the CLUBS. PS: stephen i hope the cut's fine now.

weekends were BUSY BUSY DIZZY. haha sat was just dance and more dance. and sunday was work the whole day. im really loving my job, though i cant believe i can handle demanding parents who are constantly throwing insults at us (not really only us.) it was crazy, 87 ppl for a party, and 2 party coordinators (thats us, zu, we are fantabulous no?) how is that possible? i couldve been sent to imh for that. HAHAHA

but then came monday, slacked at home before going to watch 'the other boleyn girl'. man it was really an emotional journey. eric bana is too hot, haha someone bring me a fan. but then he was a wimp in the show, and whats surprising, he came to his senses only to find its too late. i loved it, wouldnt mind watching again.

okay nows the time to dance. dance. dance.

forward or backwards

2008-04-16T07:02:00.000-07:00

one step forward, ten steps back.

i should stay where i am, right. there are so many questions that are unanswered in my heart, and asking does not gurantee i'll get the truth. it only gurantees an ANSWER. i wanna be clear of the background, the reason, the history, everything. but i know it takes time. just that im not very willing to put time into something that doesnt give results. its just normal, you dont invest time in something that isnt worth it, right? and i hate to be the cause of heartbreaks, but who can help it? sometimes it has to be done. ahh holy crap i'll just say it, and see what comes back. hint? may not even go across effectively.
will things be awkward in the future? i dont want it to be, but thats the worst it can get right? and i've been there done that, still lived through it. so why the hell not?

tuesday blues?

2008-04-15T07:37:00.000-07:00

sunday night was a real breather. went out with him to the beach, and spent the whole time talking, and enjoying the scenery. i felt so at peace, i dont know why, i didnt even feel that way when im at home or out with my parents. sometimes i wonder if im that one in many who are like the abnormals. we went to scale the pyramid at the children's playground, and with some help i manage to sit right at the top again, since many years ago. i swear i felt like i owned the world. hoho. then we wanted to go to the breakwaters but sadly they were infested with red ants and so we couldnt.

today was fun. the zoo changes each time i go there, and again i still cant leave the elephants. they're too graceful, and they are darn intelligent. who can imagine they know how to knock the cans (with bananas) to get them out, right. really. but then it rained, and we couldnt get onto the dhl balloon which we were supposed to. crap i really wanted to..stupid rain. and it was after we tediously went all the way to bugis from the zoo.

and i think each time i go out with him, its an eye-opening experience. just got to learn much more bout the world. sigh how can we be so ignorant previously? i actually thought things were roughly the same everywhere. but yeah now i see it for myself.

you know that im no good

2008-04-08T20:07:00.000-07:00

my god
yesterday was fun to the max. things can be too accurate sometimes. i was talking bout the person and he appeared right behind me. not that i was speaking ill of him, just wth. and again, i never expected different countries have SUCH different cultures and upbringings. we are really too fortunate. monogamy is rare man. kinda think its unfair to the women, but they are willing themselves, cause its inbuilt?

watched cassandra's dream in the cant-help-but-laugh-cause-its-terribly-small L9 theatre in cine cathay, but didnt expect it to be such a disturbing movie. no gore, no grinding of human bones and all, but the idea of killing your own sibling just chills. ugh
and indochine is seriously the most rockin pub to chill and hangout. changyi jwei sam and dennis we should go again! (: hoho

and sam you better tell me EVERYTHING next time. that was so shocking but its alright, the drinks made up for it. hee then again, im happy for you two. really. and it just seems so strange from the four of us (you know who), theres this strange pairing going on. but mines ancient chinese history so forget it. haha

alright im gonna miss you guys in army. like literally. PLS, PLS meet up and come visit me at wild wild wet okay!!

2008-03-10T00:14:00.000-07:00

HELLO WORLD

im back, after a very pathetic-fleeting-busy-annoying-tough-yet boring-but fun two years in JC.

results day=cry day, believe it or not everyone was crying. for good for bad im not sure. i see ppl getting 3 As exclaiming they suck. HOLY MAMA. i got a freaking c for gp. no more law. but hello political science (praying f-ing hard).

okay. i dont know what to say.

over.

CHEER!! SCREAM!!! ROCK!!!

2007-01-04T07:50:00.000-08:00

TO THE O
TO THE R
TO THE O-R-P-H-E-U-S

TO THE O
TO THE R
TO THE O-R-P-H-E-U-S

orpheus is THE crew man. once i was a year one and now im in my pe shirt when all the y1s are in orientation tees and screaming and cheering like i havent done so for like a million years. i love it. GO ORPHEUS, GO PIRATES!!

GO GO GO!!!

big. BIG release

2006-11-10T06:06:00.000-08:00

YES finally done with the ANNOYING pw. i cannot believe it dragged for a year. i love to relive the moment we handed up the GPF and it was just.. heaven.

free from sucky work, free from exams, but not free from aches. woah today echiing was like the first workout we had since a week. everywhere from hair to toe was aching like crazy. she's like the goddess! she's hot and she's a FANTASTIC dancer! oh man how can there be ppl like her on earth?? but today she made us to lots of abs exercises, and we finally saw for ourselves that freaking flat blah toned tummy of hers.
speechless.

if i was a man, i would marry her. call that obsession! haha

alright, i wanna slack!

signing off!

wans

lost in my world.

2006-11-06T02:22:00.000-08:00

could it be the little wrinkle over your nose
when you make your angry face?

woah man, it was MONTHS since i last blogged. call that busy. wonder when i'll ever put a stop to that.

promos are over, year one's over, and my life's over.
cause next year's year two. and we all dread that A-LEVEL monster. wth it was like a year ago when i just started to slack after O-LEVELS.

whats up with that?
i just want to continue dancing and not study, though i need to plough through that whole stack of econs notes for that bloody econs r-paper. damn it.

heck dont you think you're starting to see what life will offer you?
irresponsible biatches, backstabbers, political fights. oh no i have a feeling it will not end till my end of days.
but whatever it is, i cant stand looking at her.
she's not even pretty, whats with the air and stuck-up-ness? the way i describe her: Bimbotic, Idiotic, Blur (though feels fake, is it attractive to be blur? "WOW, I WANNA TRY" NO WAY!!), Annoying, Irresponsible, After fame and popularity. B-I-T-C-H-Y!

get away from me and stop annoying me before i slice you into two i say.
i mean it.

oh shit, i dont know why im feeling different from like when i first started out as a year one student.
its weird.
like as if there's this void that will not be filled until i truly see the purpose in life.
are we here to just do this?
what are we here for?
is it just me or is it a jc thing?

is it because im busy that it pulls me away from you?
does commitment matter?
maybe it did, thats how we ended up like that.
and maybe thats how it will be, and so im thinking the way i am now.
come to my concert?
back together?

dont know. but rid me of all evils, including those bestowed upon me to torture me.

TIME is running out!!!!

2006-06-21T22:10:00.000-07:00

okay lets get this straight. exams are on 26 and today's the 22. but i have not even finished bio. chem. math. oh AND econs. and thats practically EVERYTHING. god im so screwed. who can help me? its crazy. im so worrried.

what if i?
oh shoots whatever.

just a month and so much has changed, not including the fact that i still am not finished with my studies, but everything else. more or less transformed.

heck man im going to study. :*

god im so fucked up.

2006-05-30T01:16:00.000-07:00

my gosh this is no holiday. i hate this. work. pw
endless work. i cant really go out cause my conscience is telling me to study. but then again. im so tired and i cant even concentrate. what am i to do?
its all his fault. messing up my thoughts.
hes in my head.
shit

aww its the hols.

2006-05-26T06:23:00.000-07:00

god. its like the end of week ten of TERM 2. i CANNOT believe this is happening. i managed to survive through term 2. with REGALE!, sports day, so on yadayada, i think i deserve the honourary title! haha i love the life im having now. but to have to mug THROUGH the hols is NO fun. i have a wonderful class. superb friends. loving dude. what can i ask for? but then again. i want to slow down the world from spinning. im tired. mentally exhausted. and you know what? i was at wisma with my long term friend. and we had so much fun. walking through the shops. sieving through all the stuff in the dumps to look for ridiculously cheap stuff... and finally settling down to have long johns in the end. theres fried MARS bars at far east and i didnt know. god but it looked sick. OIL>CHOC>CARAMEL=SIN. haha i cannot afford to let my body down. well it was great to just hang out. have fun. and share stuff that we never thought we would do. we grew so much and its just amazing to see ourselves slowly go through the transition period. i've grown so much. through regale (woah that was a test of patience determination and physical limits), house com and dance exco. MIND-BLOWING.

well well at the end of the struggles, things wrapped up nicely. vj got a sweet victory against mj for soccer. we were just fantastic. 3 goals in the last few critical moments. we won. and we won with pride! i have never seen such spirit in my life. now im part of it and im loving it. hey doesnt this sound familiar?

oh whatever hols are here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!